The Bachelor Buzz: Week 1
Hey there beautiful people! This is my first post back since the holidays, which were very fun but very hectic. As much as I love the holidays, I feel like my life falls apart when my routine is thrown off. I felt like I was swimming through Christmas and New Years, but there was a light at the end of the tunnel. That light was THE BACHELOR.
I've been a Bachelor fan for years and years, but the show holds a very special place in my heart because it was the very first thing my boyfriend and I bonded over. Back in the day when we were chattin' on Tinder, we discovered that we both loved the show, and almost every Monday since then we have watched it together....Ya, I thought it was weird too that he watched it on his own. At the time I thought he was either gay or just said he watched the show to make me like him. But no...he is just that weird, but I can't complain.
Anyways, back to the show....Mr. Nick Viall. Half of Bachelor Nation loves him and thinks he deserves to find love too. We've seen him get runner up on both Andi Dorfman and Kaitlyn Bristow's season, and since that wasn't enough for him to kill himself, he also got a shot at love on Bachelor in Paradise. That didn't work either cause TBH, he's kinda a douche. That's why the other half of Bach Nation thinks he needs to go away. This is now Nick's FOURTH time on a Bachelor show. If he still can't find his future wife, I think it's about time he Rhonda Rousey's his way back to Wisconsin.
Per usual, the season opened up with some interviews with Nick being super awkward. I felt even more awkward when the infamous "black box" is covering Nick's wiener and we get to watch him take a shower. Like I get that he is a normal dude just trying to find love, but really? After doing some pushups, Nick meets up with past bachelors Sean Lowe, Chris Soules, and Ben Higgins IN MY HOMETOWN!! Shoutout to Bogie's Restaurant y'all!!
- Sean Lowe was one of my favorite bachelors. He is now married and has a baby with Catherine who is equally as awesome. #couplegoals
- Chris Soules isn't really relevant. He wasn't really relevant when he was The Bachelor. But he just keeps popping up everywhere because he has nothing else to do in the middle of nowhere Iowa except watch his corn grow.
- Ben Higgins. I like Ben. He is a cool dude. But Freeform's Ben and Lauren Happily Ever After annoyed the crap out of me, so I'm over it.
Next up, the girls. There were 30 of them this time! I'm just going to highlight a few who stood out me...
Homegirl straight up got out of a limo dressed up as Left Shark....because according to her bio, she is an aspiring dolphin trainer. At first I thought it was really weird, but then I was like FUCK IT. Who cares? Ya she thought she was a dolphin even though she was a shark, but whatever! She owned that costume the entire night, so kudos to her!
Probably the prettiest of the group. Not sure if she is here for the right reasons because she is an Instagram model who claims to own 3 small businesses. But she's really pretty so she will go decently far.
PSYCHOPATH. She's the one who talked to Nick for like 5 minutes, then interrupted someone else's time with him to shove her tongue down his throat. On the first night. She also "runs" (aka is Daddy's helper) a "multi-million dollar company" and has her nanny chop her cucumbers. In the season preview, they show her saying she is going to have sex with Nick and then tries to seduce him in his hotel room. Honey, if you think leading with your "platinum vagine" (her words, not mine) is going to make a man fall in love with you over 29 other women then suit yourself. Let us know how that works out for you.
So Liz actually already slept with Nick at Jade and Tanner's wedding. Then she rejected him when he asked for her number. Then she shows up on his season of The Bachelor because she realized she F'd up ...I don't buy it. If you want to be with a dude that you know, why would you choose to compete with a bunch of other girls to be with him? Also...what's a doula?!
No. Just....NO. Kudos to ABC for casting a bisexual. But, I don't think anyone ever has been into the nose ring that makes you look like a bull going after a matador. She also gets out of the limo dressed like a college girl going on her first trip to Vegas. Hard pass.
She has one of the best intros by running up to Nick in her prom dress and sneakers and says, "I thought you'd like to meet another runner up." Nice one. She doesn't get much air time, and they don't show her in any of the upcoming season clips. But she was one of my top Fantasy League picks, so I hope she stays around some.
Nothing to say about her except that if she married Nick her name would be Astrid Viall. Next to Donald Drumpf, that has to be the worst name of all time.
She's a special education teacher and is way too good for any of us. She should have been on like...Jason Mesnick's season before becoming Instafamous was even a thing.
Alright folks. That's a wrap on my very first Bachelor Buzz. I hope you enjoyed it! Thanks for reading and tune in next week for my Week 2 breakdown!!
Who are your favorite contestants so far?