The Bachelor Buzz: Week 7
Hey Bach Nation! Sorry I'm a tad late on this week's Buzz. As some of you may know, I got ENGAGED this past weekend (story coming soon), so I've kinda sorta been ignoring blog duties for Pinterest. But do not fret, I am here y'all!
...To Be Continued?
Last week, ABC left us with Nick sending half the girls home, including everyone's top pick Danielle L. He cries to the rest of the girls explaining that he doesn't know if this process is going to work for him, ie. he's not sure if he can fall in love with any of the girls. Everyone's freaking out. Is Nick going to throw in the towel? Of course not! This is his fourth shot on the show, and this time he had his pick out of 30 women. If he walked away now, I think the wrath of Twitter would be too much for him to handle. He needs to find his wife whether he likes it or not.
One-on-One Date: I'm on a Boat
By this time, Nick & Co. are in Bimini...? I just love how whenever they announce a new destination, the girls jump up and down and say how they are so excited to travel to said location. Like, for once, can't anyone just be like, "Where the F is Bimini?" It's fun to say at least.
Vanessa gets the first Bimini date, and is the first girl to get a second one-on-one date this season, so it's kinda a big deal. It is also the week before Hometown Dates, so the pressure is on.
In the Bachelor world, they only travel by helicopter or boat, so for this date, they traveled by boat. They went snorkeling. But dinner is where the good stuff happens. Vanessa knows that she has some stiff competition, so in order for her to secure a Hometown Date, she must set herself apart of the others and profess her love for Nick. Things don't go exactly as planned, since Nick responds with, "I really, really like you." He then continues to rub salt on the wound by reminding her that he has fallen in love on the show multiple times before, and has asked two sets of parents for their blessing. He wants to make sure he is right this time. Well, if that wasn't a confidence killer, I don't know what was!
Group Date: Return of the DolphinShark
Ok..it's not really the return of DolphinShark. Even though we all wish it was. For this group date, Nick, Corinne, Kristina, and Raven all go swimming with sharks. I'm pretty sure ABC edited the show to make sure they were actually swimming with a shit ton of sharks...they probably weren't.
Corinne went into the group date already pretty butt hurt because so far, she is the only one who has not had a one-on-one date, and the other girls are already starting to get second dates. To be fair, Corinne has gotten a lot of special attention from Nick so far this season. However, she gets even more butt hurt when Nick starts rubbing sunscreen all over Kristina, and even says he needs to "get the inner thigh." Awkward. Kristina gets even more attention from Nick when she gets scared of the sharks and decides to get out of the boat crying.
At the end of the group portion of the date, it was Raven who got the date rose and secured her Hometown Date with Nick.
One-on-One Date: Girl, Bai
Danielle M. gets the second one-on-one date with Nick this week. Her date card reads, "Let's ride off into the sunset." It might as well have said "Let's go to Ikea and sleep on the display beds." That's how terrible this date was. It was SO boring! I'm sorry, but Danielle M. is SO BORING! The girl is barely even audible. Even Nick admitted that he was struggling to connect and make conversation with her.
They spent their day riding bicycles around Bimini, and by the dinner portion of the date Nick probably ran out of things to talk to her about. She decides to open up to him by giving the usual spiel about how her heart is open and committed to him, and that she has never felt this way before. Nick quickly realizes that he has never felt this bored before and decides that he has to send her home, saying something along the lines of "my heart can't get there even though she is great." Danielle's response? "But not great enough."
We already discussed how Corinne is upset because she hasn't gotten a one-on-one date yet. So Corinne does what Corinne does best and steals some time with Nick to get her sexy on. She apparently thinks that her "sex skills" are so "top notch" that it will secure her a Hometown Date. She goes on to tell the camera that "her heart is gold, but her vagine is platinum." And they continue to play that clip maybe about five more times.
She stumbles over to Nick's hotel room in her Louboutin heels, and it is painful to watch her try to walk in those heels. Like girl, if you're gonna hear $900 red bottoms, learn to walk in them. Nick seems pleasantly surprised to see her and invites her in for a drink. After some making out on the couch, she leads him to the bedroom and closes the door. After a few minutes, Nick says that he doesn't think this is a good idea because he did this on Kaitlyn's season and we all know what a shit show that turned out to be. Corinne walks out totally embarrassed as this is her second time trying to seduce Nick in a very forward fashion and epically failed.
One-on-One Date: The New Jorge the Bartender
Rachel gets the last Bimini one-on-one date, and it only lasts half a day. He takes her to a local bar...aka a shack...aka a cardboard lemonade stand set up by an 8-year old. The bartender tries to get a starring role as the new Jorge on Paradise and asks them questions about their relationship. Rachel explains how she has never brought a white guy home to meet her family, so her upcoming Hometown Date should be interesting. I'm guessing it doesn't go over too well because ABC has already announced that Rachel is the next Bachelorette. She is also the first black person to star on the show. Take that Donald Trump!
The "Rose Ceremony"
After Rachel's one-on-one, Nick tells Chris Harrison that he already knows who he wants to send home and wants to skip out on a rose ceremony this week. The person he wants to send home is...drumroll please...Kristina. He takes her to the porch outside while all the other girls are obviously watching. He explains to her that he is not in love with her and that she deserves better. Ya Nick. You a piece of shit.